Not two hours after I posted my previous 'what do I do now' plaint I read this in a lovely, thoughtful post in Quaker Pagan Reflections:
I applied for membership in Mount Toby the day after I spoke in meeting for the first time. I'd been attending for over a year, but I was really blown away by what a profound experience it was to speak in meeting. It’s inexpressible to anyone who hasn’t experienced something like it. There are words that describe it, but like other very profound feelings, the words are just prattle unless you’ve been there. I felt stretched by the message passing through me, and a little wobbly when I sat down again, and—this is the important part—I felt like when my spirit contracted again, back to its normal just-human size, it never shrank back quite all the way. I was left forever afterwards a little bit larger for been a conduit for something so vast and deep.
That conduit? I think that's what I want to be.I still don't know how or 'what do I do next' but I think maybe I have an eye on where I'm heading.
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